Although saddened by the loss, my grandmother was a strong, feisty woman, who was difficult to get close to, but she lived a very long life. She buried six of her eight children, and I find comfort in knowing she is going home and will once again be close to them.
As I try to recall fond memories I have of my grandmother, I am brought back to my early childhood. My dad’s family all lived in Washington, DC, and we were the only ones who lived in NYC. I remember as a child the many trips we would take down South for no reason at all, or to spend countless holidays with our DC family. Just about every occasion and holiday was spent at Grandma’s house, and all I can think of is all the wonderful smelling and tasting foods, and how much fun I had being around all my aunts, uncles and cousins. Those good old days ended when I was about 10 years old when my parents separated, and my Grandfather and Uncle Kirk died. These are the fond childhood memories I will always hold on to, because this was a time when I didn’t realize the bad in the world, there was a lot of love and I lived my life looking through the rose colored glasses.
As an adult, my grandmother and I were never able to connect and I always felt she was cold and distant to me and most of the women in the family. However, she doted on the men in the family, as if they were kings and princes. I will never understand or now know why she was that way, but I will find solace in knowing when I graduated from college in 2009, she was proud of me and sent me my first ever card telling me so.
It is said God gives us what we can handle. I love the Lord, and I am working everyday to get stronger in His word and in my faith. As I try to deal with my grandmother’s passing in my own way, I am brought back to one of my favorite poems Footprints.
Footprints
Carolyn Carty, 1963
One night a man had a dream. He dreamed He was walking along the beach with the LORD. Across the sky flashed scenes from His life. For each scene He noticed two sets of footprints in the sand. One belonging to Him and the other to the LORD.
When the last scene of His life flashed before Him, he looked back at the footprints in the sand. He noticed that many times along the path of His life there was only one set of footprints. He also noticed that it happened at the very lowest and saddest times of His life.
This really bothered Him and He questioned the LORD about it. LORD you said that once I decided to follow you, you'd walk with me all the way. But I have noticed that during the most troublesome times in my life there is only one set of footprints. I don't understand why when I needed you most you would leave me.
The LORD replied, my precious, precious child, I Love you and I would never leave you! During your times of trial and suffering when you see only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.
Bye Grandma…
Grandma with her two great granddaughters Martequa and ShaDora in May 2009.
MY Lisa Renee... I must say that I am so sad for your loss. But, God!!! He always take care of us even when we don't realize it. Your thoughts on your Grandma were expressed very well here.I'm excited for the Glimpe of Solace because with it... You'll never have to wonder how much she lovedfd you!!! May the Lord continue to comfort you during this time. Grow in Him and He will Protect you!!! Love You!
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